Sunday, March 16, 2014
It's been four whole months since Stella was born and I still don't have the words to adequately express how excited, tired, incredulous, scared, and humbled I feel to now be her mama. While I realistically knew it wouldn't be bliss all the time, I had seriously underestimated the of hard work, self doubt, and of course sleep deprivation that would become our norm. It's been helpful to realize that most everything (the good and the bad) are just phases and will pass, and to learn to be flexible and adapt as you go along. This is especially difficult for a creature of habit, schedules and routines like me but I'm learning slowly. Most of all, my choice in how to view things has made a large difference. On a bad day, I would feel like the baby was taking me hostage, catering to her every whim. And on a good day, I would be able to tell myself that responding to her needs helps strengthen our bond and that a secure attachment will ultimately give her the confidence to explore and be independent. She can't know she's deliberately keeping me away from my sleep or household chores or online shopping, she simply just needs her mama.
Near the end of my pregnancy, I started feeling more introverted and wanted to keep my world quite small and protected, probably in anticipation of the baby and the total chaos that would ensue. After she was born, our world opened back up and I felt so supported by family and friends who encouraged us every step of the way and marveled at Stella along with us. There was great advice and not so great advice, all given with good intentions. And slowly we are learning what feels right to us and the values we want to have as parents. Navigating new parenthood can sometimes feel isolating and yet there is also great comfort knowing others who have walked the same path. In the beginning when things were just so new and difficult I couldn't wrap my brain around how other people did this and even had multiple children! Were their babies just better sleepers? Did they have selective amnesia? Now when I am up for the 4th time at night with Stella, I think about other mothers somewhere around the world that are up at that very moment with their babies as well. And if it's 5am, I think about my friend Jill who is probably up with her baby just a few miles away from me. And this helps me feel less lonely and more brave to join the ranks of these women who have come before me in loving and raising their babies.
Monday, December 16, 2013
Stella Margaret! Named after her great-great grandma and great grandma who are dearly missed. She arrived on November 13. Who knew this tiny little bundle would be so precious? Everyone is doing well (beyond the sleep deprivation) -- hope to share more soon!
Wednesday, October 9, 2013
Now that I'm in the 3rd trimester, maternity dresses are my best friend. I've had good luck with certain brands like Hatch, Splendid, and even the Liz Lange line at Target. I especially like this best dress by Rosie Pope--not only is it super comfortable but the jersey material is thicker and accommodates a growing bump nicely.
Dress: Rosie Pope
Monday, September 30, 2013
I've been feeling decidedly better mentally and emotionally as we head into the "fourth quarter" in football speak. We attended a great series of childbirth classes by Get Babied and while labor and childbirth still seems awfully terrifying, it's also reassuring to know that the many physical changes in pregnancy and the process of childbirth all actually serve a purpose. It's fascinating to think about the linea nigra (line down your belly) as an evolutionary guide to helping your baby find its way to its food source. Or how contractions during labor help squeeze the fluid out of the baby's lungs to prepare it for its first breath of oxygen.
Something else that has given us a huge sense of relief is deciding on having a doula with us at home and at the hospital for the process. It will be reassuring to have someone there to well, reassure us and walk us through this unknown time. If you're local, I highly suggest checking out the classes, services and philosophy of Get Babied!
Shoes: Loeffler Randall
Necklace: Dream Collective
Monday, September 23, 2013
Thursday, September 12, 2013
I've begun to prioritize how and when to spend my energy. If I drop a paper towel, do I pick it up? No. A sock? No. A receipt? No. A kit kat? Yes.
Dress: Ilana Kohn
Necklace: Object & Totem
Friday, September 6, 2013
I've been wearing dresses throughout this whole pregnancy which has been great in this Texas heat. I hate having anything tight on my belly so all my skirts have been packed away. Once fall arrives, I hope to get by with longer tops and leggings. I wore this outfit traveling to San Francisco recently. Can't wait for cooler weather!
Top: Ace & Jig
Necklace: Object & Totem